Everyone wants the magical pill for a better life – the steroid of a better life.
The better relationship, being more fit, being richer, being happier, but in reality, there’s only one principle we need to keep in mind.
It actually sounds a bit esoteric, but really it’s the foundation of all success and why so many people do things and don’t end up being successful at losing weight (or anything, really).
The saying is, “you attract success by the person you become.”
What if the fastest quick fix – that guaranteed success in every aspect of your life – was changing something small about yourself?
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This idea that you “attract” success by the person you become sounds a bit esoteric.
Don’t you need some kind of new strategy if you want to be more successful at losing weight, like reading a book, hiring a coach or doing something different?
I would actually argue no, and here’s why.
My friend, that’s been wanting to get fit forever, always has the same conversation with me each year.
Every year he talks about how fit he’s going to get, and rather than doing the right things, every year the first thing he does is he goes and buys supplements.
He goes and buys a freaking protein powder and $200 of supplements, and his counter is filled with pre-workouts, during-workouts, post-workouts, sleeping-workouts – and all these freaking supplements because he’s avoiding the one thing that truly matters:
Doing the work.
Doing the work means becoming a different version of himself.
The successful version of himself may just need to have more discipline, the successful version may just need to have a little more focus on what strategy or what diet he’s implementing.
The successful version may just need to say, “hey, maybe I need to plan better the night before?”
The thing here is that he’s always changing the tactic that he implements, without changing who he is.
Rather than being a more disciplined and focused person, who focuses more on creating better habits, what he actually does is he just gets a new quick fix.
A new powder.
A new supplement.
A new pill.
You see what I mean?
It’s a fundamental philosophical switch: rather than changing who he is, aka becoming better, he just does exactly what he used to do and picks a new silver bullet.
And that’s why year after year he’s in the exact same situation he always was.
The Girl With The Chronically Bad Relationship
I know a girl who’s always complaining about how little effort her boyfriend puts in – he’s not romantic, he doesn’t take time in the bed room, he doesn’t do anything sweet for her – in other words, he just doesn’t act like he cares that much.
She reads all these books and all these strategies on how to manipulate your partner into being more romantic, but none of them work.
They all work, I’m sure, but the reality is that she’s not getting the results because he and she are still the exact same people.
During one of our conversations I asked her, “Have you ever tried being the best girlfriend ever, just for a short time period – for like 30 days – just doing whatever it takes to be the best girlfriend ever. Invest tons of effort and skew that ’50-50′ ratio in the 90-10 direction, put in loads of work to make the relationship great.”
You can guess what happened.
She changed who she was, which was her actual character and the way she showed up on a daily basis, and the relationship got better very quickly.
He mirrored her and put in the effort.
The reason her former strategies didn’t work was because she was the same and he was the same.
How a Lottery Winner Made (And Lost) $10 Million in 10 Years
There’s a famous lottery winner that I featured in my book named Sharon Tirabassi.
She went from living on food stamps and taking the public city bus to work to winning ten million dollars.
Overnight she was rich – she bought multiple houses, took multiple vacations a year, bought a nice tricked out Escalade, and bought all the things she thought would mean she was successful.
She was also generous with her friends and family, and had lots of people mooching off her – the typical stuff you associate with lottery winners.
But not even ten years later, Sharon was once again broke, back to zero – so broke that she was back on the city bus and a “normal” person.
She just won the lotto – isn’t that everyone’s dream?
The reality is that her character was the exact same person she was before, and as a result, (one) reason why she might’ve been poor before was that she might not have been doing things that successful people do.
She might have been overspending.
She might not have been putting a lot of effort to be an A-player at work.
Maybe she had other things going on that led her down the road to being broke.
But because she had all these “broke” habits, once she had a doomsday level of money, those broke habits ensured she was broke again very quickly.
If she had “rich” habits, she might even have more money if she was living off the interest and managing the money properly.
And that was because her character did not understand how to earn, keep, and make money work for her.
This is what people often say when they mean, “you attract success by the person you become.”
It’s a matter of changing our fundamental character traits and habits which lead to fitness success, relationship success, financial success – all the kinds of success we want in our life.
It all comes down to changing ourselves, before we get the book, the guru or the coach.
That’s why when I discovered this habit philosophy it was such a game changer.
When I read a book now, I don’t care about the information but the two to three habits I can take away and start implementing.
What are the habits I can begin implementing to see the results from becoming a more cultivated person?
Magical Pills 2.0 And Your Tiny Daily Habit for Today
This is something definitely worth considering if you find yourself struggling to lose weight or reach the same goals you are going after.
If you find yourself repeatedly struggling, it could be about your fundamental character (your habits), and so the million dollar question is this:
What are some of the habits you can do differently that create a new version of yourself – that will pull the kind of success you want to you, both in your body, and your life?
What are your thoughts on this?
When I think about the failure of reaching my own goals, it almost always came down to my lack of consistency in what I was doing.
It didn’t matter if it was getting good grades in school, getting fitter, or writing my book.
It was a fundamental character trait.
What about you?
Do you find yourself still falling for quick fixes even when you know they can’t possibly work?
Images: Couple fight via freedigitalphotos.net